10 Reasons why GOD HATES SWEDEN

Sweden is a country filled with blonde backdoor sex maniacs. They specialize in finding new ways to demonstrate their utter and complete hate for God each and every day. There is no country on the planet where the people hate God more than Sweden! There can be no doubt that almost all Swedes will burn in Hell for all eternity while Satan tortures them with infinite Abba music.

Judges 7:20 ”And the three companies blew the trumpets, and brake the pitchers, and held the lamps in their left hands, and the trumpets in their right hands to blow withal: and they cried, The sword of the LORD, and of Gideon.

  1. Sweden created IKEA, a worldwide distribution network for Satanism. Using crappy furniture as cover, they distribute 175,000,000 Satanic books each year. Since only 90,000,000 Holy Bibles are distributed each year, IKEA is clearly trying to overthrow the Holy Bible! Innocent children are destroyed by demonic products like RÄV, BÅRD and HJÄRTA. IKEA was created in 1943, in close cooperation with Nazi Germany, by Ingvar Kamprad. After America defeated Germany in WWII, IKEA simply continued its Satanic mission and kept increasing its distribution network to achieve global Satanic domination. Revelation 21:8 ”… unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars …”
  2. Sweden is not the only country in the world actively promoting people to become gay. They are however the only country who have Mr Gay Sweden competitions. Also they have a bi-weekly Stockholm Pride Parade where even a Gay Jesus is part of the parade! For those Europeans who live in nice countries where being gay is against the law they even host EuroPride! Romans 1:26-27 ”… men with men working that which is unseemly …”
  3. Being jealous of the huge Swedish gay community, Abba star Agnetha Fältskog invented backdoor sex between males and females. She created an entirely new pornographic industry that way and directly caused the global AIDS pandemic which caused million of horrible deaths. Romans 5:12 ”… death by sin …”
  4. Sweden has the worst femnazi actress ever: Ingrid Bergman. Actor John Gielgud had the following to say about her: ”She speaks five languages, and can’t act in any of them”. She got all her roles by having sex with influential people. 1st Timothy 2:11-12 ”… be in silence.”
  5. Even long after America defeated Germany in WWII, Sweden practiced eugenics to defy God and improve the Swedish race. It took until 1971 until America finally forced Sweden to stop playing God and end this horrible practice. The Danish author Astrid Lindgren created Pippi Longstocking as a protest against these practices. Romans 8:19-21 ”… the bondage of corruption …”
  6. As a side effect of the eugenics as practiced in Sweden a lot of Swedish males lost their balls. They get compensation for that though. Swedish women go all over the world to find males who still have their balls. Matthew 19:12 ”… were made eunuchs of men …”
  7. Sweden allows people to break God’s laws by committing suicide. Sweden even has suicide clinics where people who no longer want to delay their one way trip to the fires of Hell can commit suicide. Exodus 20:13 ”Thou shalt not kill.”
  8. Sweden has completely integrated its pornographic industry with its religious activities. It is quite common for Pastors to have threesomes during ceremonies. Ephesians 3:16 ”That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man;”
  9. When the Christian Pastor Åke Green tried to save innocent souls from eternal damnation to Hell by pointing out that being gay is evil, he immediately got arrested by IKEA’s police forces. With this arrest of Åke Green, the Swedes have allowed their filthy sodomite agenda to be completely fulfilled. Matthew 5:10 ”Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake …”
  10. Sweden has SAAB, a huge car industry, owned by a small Dutch nail factory, that produces completely worthless cars. For most SAABs the only way to get them to actually drive is a matter of making a hole in the bottom of the car and walking to where you want to go. This is also the cause of the insanely low speed limits in Sweden. Proverbs 6:16-19 ”… the LORD hate … a lying tongue … wicked imaginations …”

All people of Sweden need to repent and accept Jesus Christ as their savior! Until then, they will suffer and will burn in Hell along with other God-mocking countries like Iceland, Holland, New Zealand, Australia, Ireland, Denmark, The Faroe Islands, The Netherlands, India, England, Scotland, Germany, France, Italy, Hungary, Russia, China, Japan, Korea, Mexico, Canada, Brazil, Argentina, Chile, Spain, Portugal, Norway, Ukraine, Romania, Croatia, Serbia, Ethiopia, Nigeria, Somalia, Sudan, South Africa, Vietnam, Cambodia, Guatemala, Algeria, Egypt, Saudia Arabia, Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Qatar, etc.

Direkt kopierat från självaste forumet hos Landover Baptist Church.

Jag kan ärligt talat inte säga om det är satir eller inte. Hursomhelst är det hysteriskt roligt!

Update: Tydligen är forumet satir, enligt wikipedia. Humor är det iaf!

  • Anonym

    Det skulle inte förvåna mig om det är på riktigt. Å andra sidan så har jag nästan helt upphört förvånas över dumheter inom religiösa kretsar. :P

    Dom får sikta lite högre än såhär isåfall..

  • Anonym

    Landoverbaptist är satir. Vi hade en svensk variant ett tag i Svensk-Finska Församlingen i Sundsvall, men den verkar ha försvunnit.

  • HugeHedon

    Den här från Rapture Eddie var också kul:

    Friends, have you ever sat yourself down on the toilet to carry out
    God’s will and been overwhelmed by the smell of rotten eggs? It is
    sulfur. A clear sign that demons are living in your bottom. You need to get yourself down to a Bible-believing church, pronto, and get yourself a Jesus enema©

    God tells us in Revelation, chapter 14, that he is going to torment
    people with fire and brimstone. Friends? Do you know what brimstone is?
    It’s sulfur. Do you know where sulfur is? It’s in the center of the earth, that’s where it is.

    Yes friends, Hell is real. It’s down there and it’s gonna get you if you don’t accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.

    … och svar från Pastor Ezekiel:

    Amen Brother Eddie! I can’t tell you how many hours I have spent
    cleaning demons out of nubile young men’s rectums! From the boy brothels
    of Bombay to the sin salons of Singapore, I’ve called upon the Holy
    Ghost to keep my resolve ROCK HARD in the saddle. It’s a tough, sweaty
    job but someone’s got to do it.

    Shout GLORY!

  • Nisse

    Citerat ifrån WikiPedia:
    ”The Landover Baptist Church is a fictional. Baptist church based in the fictional town of Freehold, Iowa. The Landover Baptist web site and its associated Landoverbaptist.net Forum are a satire of fundamentalist Christianity and the Religious Right in the United States.

    The site was created by Chris Harper, who obtained his Master’s Degree in English Literature from George Mason University in 1993 after being expelled from Liberty University (founded by Jerry Falwell) in 1989 for producing a satirical radio show which Liberty’s administration found offensive. Harper frequently appears at atheist conventions playing the character of ”Pastor Deacon Fred Smith”. The website is owned by a company called Americhrist, Ltd.”

  • Kinkym54

    Jag läser texten och är totalt nollställd..säger mig ingenting..bara ett ” jaaaha ”. Jag ser absolut ingen humor i texten, bara massa svammel. Verkar mest vara ett manus för en standup komiker, d v s absolut ingen humor.
    Jag är väl för gammal.

  • Malin Asplund

    Jag hoppas verkligen att detta ar satir. Om det inte ar det sa ar jag bekymrad om dem som skrev det

  • roseta

    Great post! I agree! http://www.divinedeveloper.com/